Do you play music that the wed. couple wants or music that makes people dance?

[I love music]

Sometimes couples want only "their" music to be played in their wedding. In a way thats understandable.

But if the music sucks or isnt "dancable". What do you do then?
Do you take matters in your own hands so the party doesnt flunk or do you keep within the playlist?

I ve had weddings where i took charge of the music and saved the wedding from sucking, but the couple at the end of the night didnt like it.

And i ve had weddings where i kept within the couples guidelines and the guests were furious on me, thinking that it was my idea to play hard core country from 11pm till 4am in the morning.... Literally i had one guy who wanted to start a fight with me cause he thought that it was my idea to play 5 hrs of country and NOTHING else inbetween.

The thing is, if you stay within the playlist the couple is happy. But then your dj-service looks bad to the rest of the 200 guests, cause the think you suck as a dj. If someone asks them "so how was so and so entertainment"? They ll be like "they suck...no one was dancing". So then u look bad.

Whats the smart thing to do?

[djkvg]

communicate with the bride and groom and send them your honest opinion

[Dix]

I allow 15 must play songs. After that, the client can give me as many songs as they please however, the songs may or may not get played. Of course I will play all that I can but I will decide if & when to play those extra songs.

[DJ Donnie Lewis]

I allow 15 must play songs. After that, the client can give me as many songs as they please however, the songs may or may not get played. Of course I will play all that I can but I will decide if & when to play those extra songs.

Same here. We also discuss the importance of guest involvement with their must play list

[jazzyj]

I let the couple choose as much or as little of the playlist as they want. I tell them approximately how many songs we can fit into their time frame given events and average song length.

But we also have a conversation about dancing and what works well and what won't. For the most part so far, the B&G have always taken their guests into consideration. I haven't had one yet that demanded we play these set songs and only these songs regardless of the guests. I did have one Bride that did not want one single line dance played at her reception, but after about 7 requests from guests, I had the chance to go by the Bride and let her know and she was like go for it - she just had no idea that any of her friends would like that stuff. All was well.

....incidentally, at that same reception, the Groom continuously asked me to play Sweet Dreams by Beyonce, which is a mid-tempo song that would absolutely kill the dance floor. After about his 4th request (I had been putting it off as long as possible), I finally crumbled, and to my astonishment - apparently this song has some history with him and this weird dance he does because he loves Beyonce so much. Cleared the dance floor, but all were gathered round to watch his beyonce mating dance lol.

[Stirred]

Whats the smart thing to do?

Tell the selfish broad that her wedding reception is also for her guests!!!

lol... I actually had the mother of a bride (who cut me the check) constantly ask me to play the "Godfather" theme... luckily the bride was on my side and bailed me out!

[jazzyj]

Tell the selfish broad that her wedding reception is also for her guests!!!

Correction: the wedding & reception are alllll about the bride!

[pumpitdj]

If the Bride & Groom want me to go by there playlist , I will go out to the middle of the floor and introduce myself and then let everyone know the B&G have put together a playlist for tonight , and I will not be taking any request . This way I do not look like the bad guy . But I will ask the B&G before hand if your music is not working do you mind if I throw in a few other songs , most times they will say go ahead

[Sween]

Little of both...

You need to find a way to keep them all happy... if at all possible.

I have one coming up in Sept where the B&G want to select ALL the music... I did not want the job frankly. But the parents loved me at the meeting and I was more willing to work with them than the previous DJ they interviewed. I am nervous about it. I handed them a print out of the 200 DJ Intelligence list and left it with them and said PLLLEEASE try to find some crowd pleasers in here that you actually like. I will meet with them again in July or August... I will try to set up some rules with them. I WILL play what you want... BUT when it doesn't work, what I am allowed to do... (these people like Punk music... which I hate almost as much as Country)

[RodneyL]

Little of both...

You need to find a way to keep them all happy... if at all possible.

I have one coming up in Sept where the B&G want to select ALL the music... I did not want the job frankly. But the parents loved me at the meeting and I was more willing to work with them than the previous DJ they interviewed. I am nervous about it. I handed them a print out of the 200 DJ Intelligence list and left it with them and said PLLLEEASE try to find some crowd pleasers in here that you actually like. I will meet with them again in July or August... I will try to set up some rules with them. I WILL play what you want... BUT when it doesn't work, what I am allowed to do... (these people like Punk music... which I hate almost as much as Country)

I agree with Sween. Try to find a compromise. I had a bride give me a list of 30 or 40 songs she wanted to hear recently. I only had half of them because they were very "out there". I got all the songs and played a few, but mixed in some newer more popular stuff. Everyone, including the bride, was up and dancing to the stuff I threw out there.

Respect the wishes of the person who hired you, but don't be scared to try some different things and see how it goes.

btw, great being back on DJF after such a long down time.